We all want to find love and live a meaningful life with our soul mate, sharing the good and the bad moments of our existence – but sometimes this happens later in life than we expect.
Whether your marriage failed and you are divorced, you lost a loved one or you are a mature single woman or man who couldn’t find the one yet – we are sure you have loved before in your life time and it’s just natural that you want to love again.
But finding the right person at a more mature age can be a challenge – maybe dating seems hopeless to you or you are intimidated by all the options and new developments on the dating market.
The question we want to answer is: Can older men and women still find the one true love? In this article you will find out more about why finding love later in life is better, what your chances are and what are the best places to find a romantic partner in your golden years.
Table of Contents
How dating changed over time
Dating at an older age isn’t harder, it’s just different. People have a lot of misconceptions about senior dating, making it seem much more difficult and complicated than it actually is.
For sure, back in the day, dating was very different from what it is now.
When you were younger, you probably went on a different date every week in order to find the one. You were wearing revealing clothes and putting on masks in order to be liked and categorized as “sexy” or “cool”. Falling in love with every new potential partner you encountered wasn’t a problem at all.
With age comes maturity, caused by experience and increased self-knowledge. Nowadays, you aren’t looking for the same partner you were looking for 30 years ago. There is a subtle but important difference in what singles are searching for regarding their love life.
What most young singles are looking for in a relationship:
- a sense of humour
- a sense of adventure
- good looks
- sexual attraction and drive
- similar likes and dislikes
- a similar outlook on life/life goals
What most mature singles are looking for in a relationship:
- a sense of humour and fun
- shared interests
- an intact family life
- financial security and independence
With increased age, you get to know yourself better and therefore become more confident in what you are looking for. Furthermore, in the modern world, there exist more ways of meeting someone than when you were younger – thanks to the advance in technology. Combined with increased experience, finding love later in life becomes more and more easy and enjoyable.
5 Benefits of finding love later in life
1. You know yourself better
For love to come into your life, you first need to love yourself. Your twenties are for exploring this world and experimenting with sexuality and different kinds of relationships.
At a more mature age, you had a good amount of time to get to know and shape yourself to the point where you feel at your most authentic and real self.
With time, you learn to accept all your flaws and stop being afraid of showing your true colors to this world. Once you achieve this, you will automatically attract a partner that is at the exact same point in life as you are.
2. You are more experienced
At a more mature age, you have a lot of life experience which taught you what you want and don’t want in life. This automatically leads to a more mature way of looking at love.
Do you remember the first date you went on? Your first kiss in high school, your first love, the first time you got intimate with someone, your first long-lasting relationship, your first heartbreak, your first marriage, maybe even the loss of a loved one – these experiences are all far behind you now and taught you a lot about your personal love life.
Because of your experience, you now know better what you are looking for in a life partner.
3. You have more time to spend together
Busy working days and full agendas are no longer stealing your precious time. You don’t have to take care of your family anymore, as your adult children can take care of themselves. If you are retired or close to being retired, you live your life at a different rhythm.
The pressure of success and money weighs a lot less on your shoulders. You can focus on enjoying life rather than reaching milestones like getting married, finding a career, having children and so on.
You can now focus only on yourself and, if you decide to date again, on finding a new partner for a romantic relationship.
4. You can enjoy dating a lot more
In your 20s and 30s, dating can be very stressful and at times frustrating. The social and individual pressure we put on ourselves can really take the fun out of dating.
Because you are more mature, more experienced and more sure about yourself – thanks to all your past relationships and countless dates you went on – you can now relax and enjoy searching for love a lot more.
Furthermore, you have a lot more stories to tell – which makes every date a lot more interesting.
5. Your love-ability is much higher
As Ann Smith, relationship advisor of Psychology Today, states, your ability to love increases with age, because you are richer in experience, self-knowledge, self-love and have learned from a lot of mistakes.
You had more time to reflect on your past and to heal many wounds caused by failed relationships. With increased age, you learn to be loveable, open yourself up to others, practice acceptance and make choices in a clearer and simpler way.
You are now able to approach dating and relationships in a more calm and confident way.
Chances of finding love later in life – 10 tips for success
A statistic of The senior list revealed that more than a half of over 50 year olds are married – which still leaves a lot of mature singles in their 40s, 50s and 60s. The number of divorces is getting higher and higher every year – which shows that a lot of older women and men are starting to write a new love story for themselves for the second time (or third, or fourth).
But how can you increase your chances of finding the one? The key is in being confident and open. Here are our top 10 tips to help you finding your soul mate at any age:
- Be confident: Show yourself as you are and don’t stress over a few wrinkles or white hairs. Confidence is attractive. Love yourself with all your flaws and experiences and be your most authentic self.
- Step out of your comfort zone: Throw yourself into the new online dating scene, create a dating profile and start flirting.
- Communicate clearly: Especially when it comes to finding a new love later in life, it is important to communicate to your date what you want and how you want it – before committing to anything.
- Present yourself at your best: Take good care of your appearance and choose suitable clothing which shows you from your best side. That applies for your first date as well as for your online dating profile.
- Take your time: Don’t rush anything and don’t appear desperate. Maybe it needs a second date to decide if you like someone or not, just make sure to take the time you need to get to know the other person.
- Lower your expectations: Be open to where the date can take you. It is important that you don’t force anything, better relax and enjoy without trying to control the outcome.
- (Re)learn to flirt: It is possible that you are out of practice, but flirting is like riding a bicycle – you just need to remember. Lean toward your date, touch him/her slightly, ask some intriguing questions, hold eye contact, smile – it really is that easy.
- Be honest: Honesty about your age, your expectations and your past is really important. Be honest about if you are divorced or a widow/widower – you do not need to hide anything or be ashamed of your past. Be proud of who you are.
- Embrace new things: Try new ways of finding love and meeting older men/older women, such as online dating.
- Put yourself out there: Don’t just sit at home and wait until a matchmaker appears on your doorway – visit new places, try new hobbies and meet new people in your city.
Should I give up on love at a certain age?
The answer is a clear NO. It is never too late to start looking for love. Love knows no age. If you are sure that you want to spend your golden years with someone by your side, we encourage you to start dating again in order to write your own love story!
What do you have to lose? Some fun dates, interesting conversations and new perspectives – you can only win.
Maybe you are afraid of being rejected or not being able to find the perfect match – but trust us, these doubts are normal at every age. Throwing yourself into the dating scene, especially if you are not accustomed to the new way of online dating through dating sites and dating apps, can be a real challenge.
But you can also see it as a brand new opportunity. Don’t pressure yourself, just focus on the goal – and enjoy the path. Stay positive, even if it’s the second time or the tenth time you are on a disappointing date. Focus on things that bring you joy and try to value every new experience.
Even if you are not able to find a potential partner, you can always find a new best friend. In the end, we are all longing to accompany and be accompanied by someone we love. Open yourself to all the possibilities and trust that if you are your most authentic self, you will attract what you are looking for.
Where to find true love at a mature age
You decided to start looking for a new relationship in your golden years – now the question is, where do you find romantic partners at a mature age?
Find love offline
The truth is, there are no rules when it comes to finding your soul mate, it can literally happen everywhere – in the grocery store, at the barber shop, in the cafeteria or in the waiting room of your dentist. Here are our top ideas to find your soul mate offline:
- meet older people in parks, bars, art galleries, restaurants or the theater
- visit local fairs and special events catered to mature people
- try something new and join a community – book clubs, health clubs or, if you are more of an adventurous spirit, even travel groups
- rekindle past relationships with former colleagues, classmates, neighbours or even someone you’ve dated before – maybe you will find a possible romance or a simple friendship
- you won’t believe it, but you can meet a new flame at family gatherings and events, where there is always a chance that your family invites some interesting guests
- hire a matchmaker who can help you to find a potential partner
Find love online
The modern option of a matchmaker is online dating. Dating apps like Tinder or eHarmony can be a gamechanger in the search for a new relationship. There are even specialized dating sites for mature singles like SilverSingles, SeniorMatch or OurTime.
Dating sites are super easy and straight forward to use – all you need is a smartphone and the will to open yourself to love again. You don’t even need to leave your home and can search for a new partner comfortably on your own schedule.
You cannot find your soul mate where you live? Maybe you need to broaden your horizon. With online dating it is possible to meet older singles anywhere in the world – from New York to Paris. Maybe you are up for trying something new and exciting, like a long-distance relationship?
The online dating scene makes it possible for you to find exactly what you are looking for and start dating immediately!
These 3 tips will help you to make the most out of your online dating experience:
- Choose the right dating app according to your preferences and expectations – there are dating sites for every taste, no matter if you are looking for a serious relationship, an exciting adventure or a new friend.
- Once you have chosen a platform, upload an up-to-date profile picture of you, showing you from your best side without any filters.
- Present yourself honestly and accurately on your dating profile bio, communicating clearly what you are looking for in a new partner.
If you follow our tips, there is nothing that can go wrong. We are sure that the next romantic relationship is already waiting for you – just take the first step!
Laura Blu Sandía is a conscious content creator and creative writer who has travelled to more than 44 countries and lives as an ex-pat in Colombia. She shares her creative work in form of video, photography and writing on her personal blog, Youtube Channel and Instagram. She works with various international companies as a social media manager and content creator.
Laura is a freelancer working with many international companies helping them with SEO, creative writing and content creation in both English and German. Laura offers conscious content strategy development, creative copywriting and visual storytelling for brands and individuals.
Laura graduated with a master in international business and marketing in the U.K., worked as a social media marketing manager in a tech start-up in Vienna and travelled the world as a freelance journalist. She specialises in the areas of travel, living abroad, healthy lifestyle and relationships. She studied Asian as well as Latin culture, generating content to educate and inspire others to step out of their comfort zone. As an advocate for independent living, she encourages and supports others to start their own project and become location independent.
On her blog, she publishes her writings on the topics of: adventures around the world, holistic healthy lifestyle and movement exploration. Her work has been published in various publications on Medium and Vocal. On her Youtube Channel, she shares life lessons from her travels, guided movement routines and dance sessions as well as insights into her life as an ex-pat in Colombia.
Now she is living in Colombia, working in a cultural house. There she is helping the non-profit organisation “El Canto de la Madre Tierra” preserving indigenous tradition and culture, as well as supporting the alternative medicine movement “Uba Sua” with her knowledge in marketing and international relations.
With her own brand “Blusandia” she creates creative conscious content. Laura created Blusandia out of the necessity and wish to put her experiences and skills in the service of humanity. She uses the diversity of the arts to express and create — photography, videography, painting, creative writing and her favourite art — dance. Laura is a professional dancer who performed with various dance companies around the world. She follows the motto “think less and move more” to inspire others to find their rhythm.
Besides dancing, travelling and creating, Laura loves to spend her free time taking care of her big garden, cooking healthy food, painting the walls of her house and cuddling with her 3 cats — which she rescued from the streets of Bogota.
Laura is open to social media collaborations and remote work. For inquiries, you can email her at [email protected].